I wonder what wander would bring?
Yoga has led me to this very empowered place of understanding where life no longer is happening to me but through me, of me and for me. The signs all point me to look long and loving into the mirror at all of myself, my choices to this point, my behaviours and attitudes that reaffirm my sculpted view points and my deep to the core values. Its been really tempting to blame the teacher for not meeting my needs, or shame my parents for messing up my dreams or claim the victim in a society designed for consumption of fables and fears. All of that is as real as my denial. None of it is true to my capacity to grow from challenge, take full responsibility for my identification and participation to these fabrications, and most importantly my ability to forgive and forge forward in love leading from my whole soul inspired human heart. When I trip and fall, I wasn’t fully paying attention. When I flail and fail, I needed more practice. When I lose and hurt, I redefined my perspective. When I succeed and conquer, I embraced whats next.
We aren’t arriving somewhere in our quest to achieve another goal, succeed at another pose and believe in somebody’s else dogma, because the whole point of this life adventure is to experience all of it and hopefully get to the constant expression of what gives your heart purpose and meaning on this planet. You do not do anyone any favours by morphing into their mold, or hating on their unfolding, or hiding behind the endless distractions and relentless procrastinations. You are here to share your light that is unique to your very DNA expressing either your thoughts out of control or instead your soul rising to meet valiantly its reign.
You are the only person that knows what flutters those butterflies deep in your belly and ignites a fire that opens your heart to more of infinitely possible.
So I wonder what wander would bring? I am curious what would happen if you stopped relying on the teachers to have the answers or the doctors to fix your aches or the government to decide your values. I wonder what would happen if you wandered less in line with the stories you already know the ending to and took the pen in your hands. Begin with one word and then another. Watch how the body responds… am I authoring my life from that intuitive place that allows me all sorts of flow, or am I fighting to fit in to what I know will get me the best mark or waiting for somebody else to write the first sentence for me.
You are not here to live somebody else’s vision. And you are not right now to berate somebody else’s decision. You are here to fully hone your own.
As you approach the top of the mat, what are you bowing to? Why are you feeling so tight in your hips day in and day out with no change? Where are you trying to get from this practice of shapes in space? Who are you trying to impress and who do you compare yourself to? Who do you judge and why do you want it to look like that or them? If your life is truly your own because you have claimed it, and you truly wish to live the wise teachings yoga is offering, then wouldn’t it be reasonable to say that your practice would be absolutely unique to the expression of your needs and your body and your heart each day? Don’t you want to set yourself free in the true embodiment of what it means to be whole, enough as you are and love in motion? And although that truth is the same for all of us, how it is conveyed and manifested will be exclusive to the wonders you have seen and the wanders you have experienced, the wagers you have pledged and the wishes you hold dear.
So release this limited form of yoga that is only ‘right’ in the correct alignment or perfect sequence of poses or exact tempo of breath or faultless gurus perspectives. And go ahead and explore, ask questions and feel how they resonate, adventure outside the box of the mat and see what insecurities arise and play in the waters of your body in a way that liberates your soul to shine free. Promise yourself to conform only to your hearts deepest desires and deliver yourself fully to the present in surrender to the wise guide connection on the inside of your body bending to breath, your breath believing in your boundless capacity to make this world a better place because you were brave enough to fully be all of you, always.