skip to Main Content

That little bit of giggle to my under butt.

I am moving in my body, to be with my body.

I am wearing very little clothes, uncomfortably exposed to nothing but the objects of my living room and my nagging ego. I witness the self deprecating thoughts and unkind comments that plague my inner narratives. They some how feel broadcasted from an outside learning. Every travel billboard and shampoo add all reminding me that I am flawed the way I am.

The movement starts manicured. Tangled with the fear of simply being me as if I will never be enough. It’s been whispered in the mainstream undercurrent my whole life. Reinforced like I don’t know already how to be a women, I have to wear the right outfits to be complimented or apply enough makeup to be recognized or behave just subtlety enough that I don’t take up too much space.

My body moves with the same restraints and calculated efforts. Never just allowing, always trying harder to be liked.

I have practiced biting my tongue, so as I move, my jaw is stiff.

I have practiced saying the appropriate thing to not offend or upset people, so as I move, my breath is controlled and unoffensive.

I practiced being appealing to men, so as I move, I constantly catch myself obsessing over how I look.

My movement practice reveals how I have practiced being and behaving in my life.  And even though it’s not innately myself, it’s weirdly more comfortable than just letting myself move completely unleashed and unplanned.

I continue to wake up to this incessant placating that exists in the privacy of my own home, in my own body. This practice that I thought was meant to liberate me is often reinforcing the culturally accepted programs I laid down to be a women that fits into a man made world.

It’s in these moments I start shaking wildly. Like I have ants crawling all over me and I need to get them off. This person I have created isn’t always the person I feel inside my heart. It’s in this moment of taking up all the space in my living room, no make up, unshaved and dressed how I fucking want, that I can feel hEr/ Me \ my whole heart banging at the walls of my internal organs to come out and be seen as myself unashamed and unabashed.

The shaking makes my breath erratic, it allows my body to come alive from the inside out, and all of a sudden I drop onto the floor lying on my back to witness the thawing of who I have always been burried under the hardened ways I learned to fit in.

It’s in this moment I drop into my heart. I greet an infinite source of compassion. And it’s considerate tenderness takes the disfiguring thoughts, gently folds them into a paper boat, and sets them sail, out to sea.  To dissolve and become one with my wonder of unknown and the unseen beyond what society thinks I should be.

It is true. I am softer in my body now than I was before. And when I don’t look into the mirror, or look too closely with my eyes, I feel the most right in my body I have ever felt. I have welcomed back my luscious femininity like a long lost friend. She rubs my back gently reminding me that the eyes are trained by a shamed and objectified version of what a body should look like.

And it’s my time to set myself free.

To move for joy, for pleasure, from curiosity, towards play.

To empower, to yield more sensitivity in all my strong spots and slow down to greet the wisdom of all my weak parts.

To transform stagnant energy into fuel for a life that lifts me up somedays and gently lies me down other days.

To rhythm with my inner prism of ever changing colours.

To bless and appreciate the animal I am with the innate wisdom that movement has always been my expression to make.

To frolic, to prowl, to lift, to lunge, to run, to roll, to shake, to sway, to plunge and to fall.

To revere moving my body for the gift that it is as an offering of the love I am and the whole I have always been.

This body isn’t broken from childbirth because it’s recovering, it’s a creative goddess. This body isn’t chubby because its softer and has a bit more cellulite, it’s more tender to needs of my baby girl and the injustices of our system. This body isn’t out of shape because the muscles aren’t defined like the dehydrated dysfunctional anorexic on the magazine cover that our culture seems to idolize, it’s fit to explore the world through my baby girls eyes. From the floor, rolling around humble to our earthliness, in a squat inspecting a new wonder, reaching up to climb, to rise above for a new view point, tickling her neck folds to hear her giggles, packing her on my back in the woods to show her our beautiful home and to the sound of music, dancing together in my the living room.


When I wonder the beach with Rosie, she isn’t shaming her cute rolls, her fascination motivates her movement and she practices over and over, without a personal trainer or a set workout time, or an objectified reason to make her body look a certain way. She is not conditioned by insecurity or image yet. Her only goal is to understand the world more clearly and to be free to engage with it more intimately as herself.

As I wonder the forest with Rosie, I see the way no two trees are alike nor do I observe any two babies the same. They move, play, climb, crawl, grab, fumble and express in their own unique way.

The more time I spend really getting to know my body from this space of loving myself and nourishing my body and heart with movement for joy, for peace, for expression and for vibrancy, the more I see that the cultural programming that is being perpetuated is what is unhealthy and unfit.

So I ask myself this,
Why would I try so hard to make my body look like something outside of my honest full hearted and loving expression.

Who am I training to become, a well conditioned competitive structure that obeys a cultures sick definition of beauty?
Or  I can allow a freedom of expression from the place of the inherent beauty I have always been, deconditioned from the outside and reconnected to my inner knowing I uniquely came here to uncover.

Motherhood has welcomed that little bit of giggle to my under butt. It’s has freed me from that constrictive lasso around my waist that constantly mames me if I am not sucking in.  And it has encouraged a less masculine armour around my shoulders and arms that felt the need to pretend I have it all together. That maybe it’s okay to be uncoordinated, a bit disheveled and unruly, to feel my imperfect ugly so the only thing that is left to offer the world is my perfect beauty.
This, my wholehearted love in expression, moves me. I seek to move now defined by my wild and bountiful nature. To embody myself as a woman of my own creation.
Bare for all to see. This is unappologetically me.

This Post Has 250 Comments

  1. Beautiful. What a blessing this postpartum body is, allowing us to unlearn what a “good” body should be.

  2. I am a website designer. Recently, I am designing a website template about The boss’s requirements are very strange, which makes me very difficult. I have consulted many websites, and later I discovered your blog, which is the style I hope to need. thank you very much. Would you allow me to use your blog style as a reference? thank you!

  3. I do accept as true with all the ideas you have introduced for your post. They’re very convincing and can certainly work. Nonetheless, the posts are very short for novices. May you please lengthen them a bit from subsequent time? Thank you for the post.

  4. I may need your help. I tried many ways but couldn’t solve it, but after reading your article, I think you have a way to help me. I’m looking forward for your reply. Thanks.

  5. I would like to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this website. I am hoping the same high-grade website post from you in the upcoming as well. Actually your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own web site now. Actually the blogging is spreading its wings fast. Your write up is a great example of it.

  6. Today, I went to the beach with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is completely off topic but I had to tell someone!

  7. My brother suggested I might like this blog. He was totally right. This post actually made my day. You cann’t imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

  8. Usually I do not read article on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very forced me to try and do so! Your writing taste has been amazed me. Thank you, quite great article.

  9. Howdy outstanding blog! Does running a blog like this take a great deal of work? I have very little knowledge of programming but I was hoping to start my own blog soon. Anyways, if you have any recommendations or tips for new blog owners please share. I know this is off topic but I just needed to ask. Cheers!

  10. Howdy this is somewhat of off topic but I was wondering if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding skills so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  11. I loved as much as you will receive carried out right here. The sketch is tasteful, your authored subject matter stylish. nonetheless, you command get bought an edginess over that you wish be delivering the following. unwell unquestionably come further formerly again since exactly the same nearly a lot often inside case you shield this increase.

  12. I’m impressed, I must say. Rarely do I encounter a blog that’s both educative and engaging, and let me tell you, you have hit the nail on the head. The issue is something that not enough folks are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I found this in my search for something relating to this.

  13. I like the valuable information you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your weblog and check again here frequently. I am quite certain I will learn lots of new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

  14. Great beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your site, how can i subscribe for a blog web site? The account aided me a acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast provided bright clear concept

  15. We stumbled over here different website and thought I might as well check things out. I like what I see so now i am following you. Look forward to looking at your web page for a second time.

  16. I was wondering if you ever considered changing the layout of your site? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for only having one or two images. Maybe you could space it out better?

  17. Together with almost everything which seems to be developing inside this particular subject material, all your perspectives are generally somewhat exciting. Nevertheless, I beg your pardon, because I do not subscribe to your whole idea, all be it refreshing none the less. It would seem to everyone that your opinions are generally not entirely validated and in actuality you are generally your self not really thoroughly confident of your assertion. In any event I did enjoy reading through it.

  18. I don’t even know the way I ended up here, however I thought this publish used to be good. I don’t recognize who you are however definitely you are going to a famous blogger in case you are not already. Cheers!

  19. happyland88 มั่นคง ถ้าหากนักพนันได้ เลือกเล่นเกม สล็อตออนไลน์ pg slot กับเว็บไซต์ เกม สล็อตออนไลน์ที่มี ความยั่งยืน ไม่เป็น อันตราย happyland88 เป็นเว็บไซต์ตรง ที่แตกง่าย

  20. pgslot เว็บตรง ฝากง่าย คุณพร้อมที่จะเริ่มการผจญภัยในเกมที่น่าตื่นเต้นแล้วหรือยัง? ไม่ต้องมองหาที่ไหนอีกแล้ว PGSLOT เว็บฝากง่าย ที่ความสะดวกสบายมาบรรจบกับความตื่นเต้น

  21. Howdy! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a collection of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us valuable information to work on. You have done a extraordinary job!

  22. pg luckyfun456 เปิดประสบการณ์ใหม่ของคุณไปกับการเล่นเกมที่ pg soft ให้ได้เงิน เว็บไซต์ เกม pg game สล็อตอันดับต้น ๆ ไม่ผ่านเอเย่นต์ ถูกต้องตามหลักสากล pg slot ให้ทุกท่านเล่นได้

  23. เทคนิคการหมุนสล็อตให้แตก ยากได้เงินจากการพนัน ควรจะมีเคล็ดวิธีหยุดหมุนสล็อต เพื่อช่วยทำให้นักพนันมีตัวช่วยสำหรับเพื่อการสร้างผลกำไร PG SLOT ซึ่งแนวทางหมุนสล็อตยอดฮิต

  24. ทางเข้า pg slot แต่ว่าปัจจุบันนี้นั้นโทรศัพท์เคลื่อนที่เป็นตัวทุกสิ่งให้พวกเราสามารถ เข้าเล่นเกม พีจีสล็อต ได้แล้วนอกเหนือจากการโทรศัพท์เข้าโทรออกและปัจจุบัน PC ก็สามารถเล่นได้

  25. สล็อต PGSLOTแตกง่าย เล่นง่ายได้เงินจริงผู้ให้บริการเกมสล็อต pg slot ออนไลน์บนโทรศัพท์เคลื่อนที่ที่มีเกมนานาประการให้เลือก เป็นเกมรูปแบบใหม่ที่ทำเงินให้ผู้เล่นได้เงินจริง 

  26. pg slot ทดลองเล่นได้ง่าย คุณพร้อมที่จะเริ่มต้นการเดินทางที่น่าตื่นเต้นผ่านอาณาจักรของเกมออนไลน์แล้วหรือยัง? อย่ารอช้า PG SLOT ทดลองเล่นเพื่อรับ! ในบทความนี้ เราจะสำรวจโลกที่น่าดึงดูดใจ

  27. สล็อต ทดลองเล่น เว็บรวม พีจีสล็อต พร้อม สูตร ครบจบในเว็บเดียว เรานั้นเป็นอีกหนึ่งเว็บที่ได้ รวมเว็บสล็อตเว็บตรงทุกค่าย ไม่ผ่านเอเย่นต์ หรือ ไม่ผ่านคนกลาง แถมทางเรายังเป็น

  28. Hi there! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this site? I’m getting tired of WordPress because I’ve had issues with hackers and I’m looking at options for another platform. I would be awesome if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.

  29. Hey There. I found your blog the use of msn. This is a very smartly written article. I will be sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your useful information. Thank you for the post. I will definitely comeback.

  30. Great article! This is the type of information that are meant to be shared around the web. Disgrace on the seek engines for not positioning this submit upper! Come on over and talk over with my web site . Thank you =)

  31. Please let me know if you’re looking for a article author for your site. You have some really great posts and I think I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d really like to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested. Kudos!

  32. After looking over a number of the blog articles on your site, I honestly like your way of blogging. I saved it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon. Please check out my web site as well and let me know how you feel.

  33. I really love your blog.. Pleasant colors & theme. Did you make this website yourself? Please reply back as I’m planning to create my very own website and want to learn where you got this from or exactly what the theme is called. Thanks!

  34. Hey are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and create my own. Do you need any coding knowledge to make your own blog? Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  35. Good day! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this post to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

  36. My coder is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on numerous websites for about a year and am worried about switching to another platform. I have heard great things about Is there a way I can transfer all my wordpress content into it? Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

  37. Нужна стяжка пола в Москве, но вы не знаете, как выбрать подрядчика? Обратитесь к нам на сайт! Мы предлагаем услуги по устройству стяжки пола любой площади и сложности, а также гарантируем доступные цены и высокое качество работ.

  38. Hey I know this is off topic but I was wondering if you knew of any widgets I could add to my blog that automatically tweet my newest twitter updates. I’ve been looking for a plug-in like this for quite some time and was hoping maybe you would have some experience with something like this. Please let me know if you run into anything. I truly enjoy reading your blog and I look forward to your new updates.

  39. Сайт с радостью предлагает услуги машинной штукатурки. Не упустите свой шанс на революционные изменения в области ремонтных работ.

  40. Howdy! I realize this is somewhat off-topic but I had to ask. Does running a well-established blog like yours take a lot of work? I’m completely new to operating a blog but I do write in my diary everyday. I’d like to start a blog so I will be able to share my experience and thoughts online. Please let me know if you have any ideas or tips for new aspiring bloggers. Appreciate it!

  41. It’s a shame you don’t have a donate button! I’d without a doubt donate to this superb blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to brand new updates and will talk about this blog with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  42. Howdy exceptional blog! Does running a blog similar to this take a lot of work? I have no expertise in programming but I was hoping to start my own blog soon. Anyway, if you have any suggestions or tips for new blog owners please share. I know this is off topic nevertheless I just needed to ask. Thank you!

  43. Hello there I am so happy I found your site, I really found you by error, while I was browsing on Askjeeve for something else, Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say cheers for a fantastic post and a all round enjoyable blog (I also love the theme/design), I dont have time to look over it all at the minute but I have saved it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the fantastic jo.

  44. When I originally commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now every time a comment is added I recieve four emails with the same comment. Perhaps there is a means you can remove me from that service? Thanks!

  45. imba96 ออนไลน์ ยังมีการบริการลูกค้าอย่างมืออาชีพ ที่พร้อมให้คำปรึกษาและแก้ไขปัญหาต่างๆ pg slot ให้กับผู้เล่นโดยตลอด ไม่ว่าจะเป็นการสอบถามด้านเทคนิค การเลือกเล่นเกมส์

  46. When I initially commented I clicked the -Notify me when new feedback are added- checkbox and now every time a comment is added I get four emails with the same comment. Is there any method you may take away me from that service? Thanks!

  47. An impressive share, I just given this onto a colleague who was doing a bit analysis on this. And he in actual fact bought me breakfast because I discovered it for him.. smile. So let me reword that: Thnx for the deal with! However yeah Thnkx for spending the time to discuss this, I really feel strongly about it and love studying extra on this topic. If possible, as you turn out to be expertise, would you thoughts updating your weblog with more details? It’s highly useful for me. Massive thumb up for this blog put up!

  48. С Lucky Jet каждая минута может принести прибыль! Зайдите на официальный сайт 1win, чтобы начать играть и выигрывать.

  49. Im not that much of a online reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your site to come back in the future. All the best

  50. Today, I went to the beach with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is entirely off topic but I had to tell someone!

  51. Somebody essentially lend a hand to make significantly posts I might state That is the very first time I frequented your web page and up to now I surprised with the research you made to create this particular put up amazing Excellent job

  52. Its like you read my mind You appear to know a lot about this like you wrote the book in it or something I think that you could do with some pics to drive the message home a little bit but instead of that this is fantastic blog An excellent read I will certainly be back

  53. I was recommended this website by my cousin I am not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such detailed about my trouble You are amazing Thanks

  54. I blog frequently and I really appreciate your content. This great article has really peaked my interest. I am going to book mark your site and keep checking for new information about once a week. I subscribed to your RSS feed as well.

  55. We are a group of volunteers and starting a new scheme in our community. Your web site provided us with valuable information to work on. You have done an impressive job and our whole community will be grateful to you.

  56. Hi are using WordPress for your blog platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and create my own. Do you need any coding knowledge to make your own blog? Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  57. На этом сайте [url=][/url] вы сможете бесплатно и без регистрации аккаунта протестировать тестирование разума. Следите за актуальными тестами и исследованиями и не забудьте добавить сайт в закладки для мгновенного доступа к новым психологическим открытиям. Узнайте первыми глубокие аспекты вашего внутреннего мира. Приготовьтесь к удивительным фактам с последними исследованиями. Открывайте для себя новые грани своего ума с тестами на самопознание. Разгадайте тайны своей психики, проводя каждое исследование на нашем ресурсе. Погрузитесь в свой внутренний мир с каждым исследованием. Ощутите всю палитру чувств в процессе тестирования каждого исследования. Определите свои индивидуальные черты с путем психотестов. Узнайте неизведанные аспекты своего “Я”. Раскрывайте потенциал с каждой процедурой и стремитесь к лучшему. Поймайте момент своего личностного роста. Раскройте свой внутренний потенциал с исследованиями личности. Готовьтесь к самопознанию. Познавайте себя лучше. Достигайте гармонии с самим собой.
    Самые популярные темы:
    [url=]Тесты на развлекательные темы[/url]
    [url=]Тесты на личность и темперамент[/url]
    [url=]Тесты на любовь и семью[/url]
    [url=]Тесты на здоровье[/url]
    [url=]Тесты на психологические отклонения[/url]
    [url=]Тесты на образование[/url]
    [url=]Тесты для женщин[/url]
    [url=]Тесты для мужчин[/url]

    Психотесты становятся неотъемлемой частью нашего самопознания. Они помогают обнаруживать новые аспекты личности. Участвуем в тестированиях, мы взираем в глубины своей души, позволяя испытывать моменты самопонимания.

    Исследование личности – это не просто процедура анализа индивидуальных черт личности, но и метод самопознания. Каждый аспект теста – это как фонарь, освещающий наши внутренние тайны. В процессе прохождения теста мы сталкиваемся с душевными силуэтами, которые делают нас уникальными и несравненными.

    Тестирование раскрывают не только наши сильные черты, но и тенденции к улучшению. Они становятся своеобразным инструментом роста. Прошедши тест, мы приближаемся к пониманию себя и выявляем перед собой новые горизонты возможностей.

    Исследования психики призваны обогатить наше восприятие мира и распахнуть ворота к неизведанным аспектам нашей психологической реальности. В процессе взаимодействия с тестами мы осмысливаем свои индивидуальные реакции на различные сценарии, формируем внутренний ландшафт.

    Таким образом, тестирование разума становится путеводителем в себя. Позвольте себе погрузиться во внутренний мир с психологическими тестами и раскрывать глубины своей психики. Станьте свидетелями собственного роста и путеводителями в собственных мыслях. Вас ждут захватывающие откровения на страницах психотестов. Исследуйте глубины своего “Я” вместе с нами.

  58. Pretty great post. I simply stumbled upon your blog and wanted to mention that I have really enjoyed browsing your blog posts. In any case I’ll be subscribing for your feed and I hope you write again soon!

  59. I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this website. I’m hoping to see the same high-grade blog posts from you in the future as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my very own blog now 😉

  60. Does your site have a contact page? I’m having a tough time locating it but, I’d like to send you an e-mail. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great site and I look forward to seeing it improve over time.

  61. Fantastic read! 🌟 Your insights on [topic] have absolutely broadened my perspective in ways I hadn’t anticipated. I’ve been tracking discussions on this topic for a while, but your angle is refreshingly unique. The way you’ve integrated data with engaging narratives is simply brilliant. 🧠💫 Your narrative abilities are exceptional, and the examples you offered were both informative and engaging. It’s rare to find a piece that not only informs but also entertains, and you’ve done exactly that! I’m particularly intrigued by your point about the concept. It’s given me much to think about and has fueled a curiosity I’m keen to explore further. Keep up the fantastic work! I can’t wait to see what topic you tackle next. Your blog is a source of enlightenment and motivation. 🚀📚

  62. When I originally commented I seem to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now every time a comment is added I get four emails with the same comment. Is there a means you can remove me from that service? Appreciate it!

  63. This design is wicked! You certainly know how to keep a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Great job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

  64. Hi, I do believe this is an excellent site. I stumbledupon it 😉 I’m going to come back once again since I saved as a favorite it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide others.

  65. I’m impressed, I must say. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s both equally educative and interesting, and let me tell you, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The problem is something that not enough folks are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy that I found this in my hunt for something concerning this.

  66. Howdy! This blog post could not be written much better! Going through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept preaching about this. I’ll forward this article to him. Pretty sure he’ll have a great read. I appreciate you for sharing!

  67. እንኳን ለአሁኑ! የዓይን ካንሰር ከተከፈተ ነው የተለያዩ የውጤቶች በመብት እንደሚከተለው ይረዳል ብለን ተለዋጭ የሆነ አልነበረንም! አንዳንድ እናቶችን በተለይም መተግበር ማለት ነው እና እንዴት በአንድ ተለይተናል እንደሚባል መንገድ ይኖራል። ከዚህ በፊት የሚጠቀሙትን የሚከተሉትን የሚረዱትን መረጃዎች እንደምንመለከተው መረጃ አካሄድ እንድትችል ይከታተሉን።

  68. Hey just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The words in your article seem to be running off the screen in Internet explorer. I’m not sure if this is a formatting issue or something to do with browser compatibility but I thought I’d post to let you know. The layout look great though! Hope you get the issue resolved soon. Cheers

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *